Fuck menstruation. Fuck the cramps. Fuck the mood swings. & fuck the one who dares even try to steal my boyfriend from me. Anyone who touches him will face the ultimate doom... So kindly keep your hands to yourself & off my MAN! thanks so much... *smiles sweetly*
Yes i know, i am very contradicting. But i can't help it. It's just me. I'm not a bitch in case you were wondering. I'm just a loner with a sexaye attitude. Haha... no la... If you know me well, you'll probably understand, I'm just very protective over what i have. Like my friends, family and especially my dearest boyfriend! mmmm. I'm sorry. Maybe i'm over doing it. But i'm afraid to lose you boy. It's not that i don't trust you. For god's sake i've never trusted anyone this much... It's just that no matter what. Everyday my only fear that resides deep within is that of losing you love. I can't lose you... Cause i'd be lost without you. I can't sleep without you on my mind. I can't breathe if you're not by my side... I can't take a step forward without you guiding me. I can't cry my heart out without leaning on your shoulder. I can't see things clearly if you weren't there to show me. I wouldn't love anymore if you're not here. Boy, you are all i longed for. all i ever wanted and needed... I can't let you go. But if letting you go makes you happy, i'll try to. No matter how much hurt it would bring to me. I'd feel the purest of pains just to see you smile. Boy you're making my life so worthwhile.
My insides are killing me... As i imagine your face placed next to another girl, a different one. Not me anymore... The picture perfect smiles. Would you be happier if you were with someone else? Do i make you feel different & special? Did the things i do for you make a huge difference & impact on your life? Did I effect the pace of the beating in your heart? Did i make you lose your breathe with each touch? I wanna know boy. Everything i don't dare ask you. I'm asking you now, tell me please baby... Cause I can't say it to your face. I don't know how.
Baby, tears roll down my face as i think of the ways i could be replaced. Carve me in your heart? so we'll never be apart? at least tell me and assure me that i've left pleasant memories behind. at least remind me and whisper to me that you loved me most of the time. my heart's aching and it's sore. but why do i keep coming back for more. I don't wanna play this like it's a game but baby you're slightest movement is driving me insane. I love the way you play with my fingers. I love the way you stare at me. I love the way you'd hold me tightly. I love the soft kisses you plant on my cheeks. I still feel them everyday. I'll remember the warmth of your touch.
Baby, i can assure you. You have left a huge imprint in my mind, heart, body and soul. You're everything to me. and no matter what happens. If we don't make it together at the end of the armsrace. At least know that you've given me sweet memories that can never be erased nor can they be replaced. i love you boy, i cherish each moment that you're Mine. No one else's... but in time to come, things may be different. You may belong to some other girl, and me to another guy. But baby, let's remember the times. You'd stick by me, and i'd stick by you. Remember all the silly things we'd do. It was just us two, yeah it was me and you.
But baby, for now let's embrace what we have before it's gone and we can't get it back.
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Going to be15yearsold May27 1993
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